i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
