But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
