I miss vodka workout Fridays
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
