I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Drake has all the answers
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
