I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
