just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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