We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
