dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize