North Korea, Best Korea!
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
