Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize
