Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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