Cold hands, warm shart.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
handjob tips. give me some.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
