If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
