I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
