you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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