Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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