At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
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