I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
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