i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
