You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
