I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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