I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
