I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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