"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize
