This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
