I feel great
I just peed on a car
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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