Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
