You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
