And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
