return my video game
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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