in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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