I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
