Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
