well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I fill condoms, not promises.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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