coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
