She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Let's get the cat blown out
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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