Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
