it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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