At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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