Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
you will always have a special place in my vag
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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