I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
