why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
