take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
