dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
All I want is dick and wine.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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