Buhtt sex?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize