In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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