Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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