Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
