Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
