Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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